The day that I was diagnosed with a brain tumor was the most intense day of my life! That was the day that everything changed. So many thoughts went through my head–from “Am I going to be alright?” and “What is going to happen to my children?” to “I need to be alright!” and “My children need me!” Over the next few days I went through a process of letting go of the old life I had been living for 23 years and would begin living a new and intention-filled life.
You see, the brain tumor diagnosis was the third major life event that happened to me in a 30 day period! First, I was laid off from what had been my dream job. Second, two days before the brain tumor was discovered I learned that my 23-year marriage was coming to an end. So, when I received the news that I required brain surgery to remove the benign brain tumor I literally felt like I had been hit over the head with the biggest hurdle of my life.
So began my journey of self-discovery. My first intention was that I would recover and I would live a life that is aligned with my true purpose. I would find joy in all the small and large things in my life! Everyday I would wake up grateful that I am alive and well! I took having a positive attitude to a new level!
Time for some changes! How much more clear could that have been?!?
In fact, when I got home from the hospital and people started visiting one of my friends said “When you look up positive attitude in the dictionary there must be a picture of you!” It was as if I had flipped a switch. Every word that came out of my mouth had to do with finding the silver lining in a bleak situation. It was freeing and felt light and wonderful!
My first brain surgery was in December 1997. Almost 11 years later in mid-October 2008 I had a second surgery to remove the remainder of the tumor. It seems hard to believe that so many years have passed since those two important episodes in my life occurred. As these very important anniversaries come to pass, I want to share a little bit about my journey with each of you.
That crazy statement that “today is the first day of the rest of your life” really applies to my awakening on that important day in my life almost 19 years ago! My journey took me to places I never thought imaginable! Being open to the possibilities in my life helped me to always see the positive in every situation and find a new reality. Instead of accepting mediocrity and obligation as my means of getting through each day, I adopted a new paradigm of reaching beyond my comfort zone, trying new things and meeting new people. I started living my life by design instead of just by chance. In other words, I set some goals, made a plan and began taking action to create a life of meaning every second of every day!
In the two months following my first surgery, I found a new peace. I was no longer stressed about everyday little things. In the big picture (the vision) what really mattered were the people in my life. I discovered who was able to support me. People that I thought would show up for me in big ways when I really needed them weren’t available. People that I had never thought were true friends did show up in my life in unimaginable ways giving me perfect support at the perfect time.
I let go of some friendships that were not serving me. One of my lessons was that I don’t need lots of close friends in my life. I’m good with a few deep relationships.
As my life moves forward and I learn more about what gives me joy, I continue to evaluate how I spend my time. I no longer feel obligated to people or events that don’t have deep meaning for me. I’ve reached a new maturity and realization that I must stay focused on my dreams and passions. The other part of this is understanding that the journey is really what is important. The process and the day-to-day experiences create our lives. We can choose to create meaning and manifest our dreams! It is all within our power!
The journey continues. Tune in as I share more about my life lessons. Looking forward to your comments.
Live a joyous life! Live a life of true meaning and purpose!
With love & light,